Saturday, January 3, 2009

Edwin's Tale

Nick and I had the wonderful opportunity of attending Peter Breinholt's Christmas concert this holiday season. While there it occured to me that some of you might not know exactly why we have Edwin's Tale as a music choice on Cole's blog. It is about a soldier at war. We first heard the song on Cole's blog a few days before he died. Luke's beautiful wife Hollie, put this all together and it immediately captured how we felt, while going through everything with Cole.
All around us huge history making events were happening around us. The war in Iraq, Presidential elections and even just everyday drama. And here we were in this tiny room with our son, praying that he would live. The importance and purpose of life, profoundly made it clear to me. I didn't know what was happening with those outside of our room, and at that point, I didn't care. It wasn't important. All that mattered was the time that we had left with Cole. The first few weeks preceding and after his death, I felt at times that I couldn't breathe. When the doctors came and gave us the news I was crushed. I felt my life closing in around on me, and yet in those moments of sorrow, I knew that somehow, in some way everything was going to be alright. Cole's spirit was and is so strong to this day. There hasn't been a day yet, that I haven't felt him by my side. He is so kind to me. And still everyday is different. Some are harder than others, but I know that he is in his Father's arms, and keeping his promise to stay by my side. We love you buddy! Happy 2 month birthday tomorrow!! xoxo Mommy